Have you ever thought about why we have pain? It’s such an unpleasant experience and it’s our body doing it to itself but pain serves a vital purpose. It’s the body’s way of protecting us from further damage and to warn us when something is wrong and action is required.
Hurt is kind of the same. We hurt because we love and when someone lets us down in some way it causes this reaction of fear, anger and sadness because we don’t want to lose that love. It’s a call to action to address the issue but addressing issues can be painful, it requires self reflection and acknowledging the ways in which we hurt each other.
It’s rarely malicious. Life is hard and maintaining any sort of relationship with another person is bound to be difficult at times because we are not bees, we don’t have a hive mind. We think and feel differently and sometimes it’s just a bit of clumsy wording or a misplaced thought at the height of high emotions. Nobody is perfect and nobody can get it right all the time.
We have a choice with hurt. We can either hold onto it like a security blanket to protect us, bringing up the draw bridges and flooding the moat but then it eats away at you, constantly retraumatising you as the memory echoes around your mind like a game of squash, or we can choose to let go and remember the reason why it hurts in the first place, because we love.
I make it sound easy and it is not, it takes a lot of effort, it takes a lot of time and sometimes we will get it wrong and we have to allow ourselves to feel that too but time is a great healer, those wounds can be mended, you just have to want to heal.
That’s not to say that you should allow your heart to be a door mat or that you should ignore what your own intuition is telling you. Forgive when the mistakes were genuine but not if they are repeated over and over again, death by a thousand cuts is not how a heart should go. To make the same mistake over and over again and expect a different outcome is the definition of insanity but love can make us insane sometimes.
To let go of hurt, you need to embrace hope. Build something new, something stronger. Sweep away the rot and decay. Share together, care together, be together. Make new memories. Remember the reasons you were together in the first place. If there is love, there is hope. Hold onto that, not the hurt. Learn our lessons, forgive our mistakes but move on with honesty, with clarity, with determination but most of all, with love!
Each baby step, each little footprint in the sand, each dawning of a new day. They all take you closer to your destination from where your journey began.
Recovery
Brick by brick
Piece by piece
Pick up the glass
From round your feet
Drops from above
Well let it rain
For nothing good
Comes without strain
I see your face
I feel your breath
I take your hand
Upto my chest
From the dust comes the fresh air
From the darkness comes the light
From the embers come the fire
That burns right through the night
Let your tears be my mortar
Your hands be my spade
As we add another layer
To this life we made
New shoots
Recovery
Was twisted metal
Now green I see
A fresh start
A new day
A broken heart
Doesn’t have to end that way
Rant Over 